Thoughts

[D/\SH]

Re: Thoughts

Honestly dude, can you feel the love? 5 pages of posts with advice, kind words, props and support. People who don't even know you care about you enough to take time out of their days to send you messages, just because you seem like a great guy. Okay, here comes the devil's advocate part, you might not like this, but here goes. I didn't know when you first talked about this that this girl worked for you. Do you know what kind of problems this could cause for you? She probably knows about your work on SPJ and all of this, right? I understand that you believe that she wouldn't do anything to hurt you, but she's already shown that she has no problem with hurting you, right? Did you ever stop to consider that she played you because she could and that she's going to use you to the best of her abilities? Remember that son I told you about? Found out that they are expecting again and now are happily in love again. Two week turnaround on that one, huh? He believes that she wants to stay and that she is going to stay and that she loves him and everything is peachy. Still, is there an explanation for the "friend" that bought her a cell phone, so she could text with folks, other than her husband? The restricted chat site, that she "moderates" and the email addresses that he doesn't know about? BTW, if someone were to have told you about this, and it was happening to them, would you tell them to be friends with someone who not only betrayed them, but wants to continue to be friends. Isn't one of the things about being a friend that you can trust someone? "Forgetting" to disclose about a boyfriend, what about if she had forgotten to disclose being born male? Would that make a difference to you? What else hasn't she told you? Can you ever trust someone who showed they weren't trustworthy, or are you just holding on, hoping that she's going to change her mind and your life will be perfect? I wanted to let you know that I actually thought about you all last night and today, because your current situation hit kind of close to home for me, because of my son. Ultimately, it is up to you what you will put up with from people, girlfriend, friend or not. Bear in mind that whatever you put up with now, you will be expected to tolerate even more than that in the future. Don't mean to sound vicious, but you really sound like a sweet guy who wants things to be good and is willing to put up with a lot to make other people happy, even if that means that he's miserable. You don't deserve to be miserable. ***Also, instead of spending gobs of money on a counselor, there is apparently a graduate school in Grand Rapids that does low cost counseling. It's done by grad students and interns under supervision. If you need a referral, they can do that too. The following is from their site. Don't know how to code, so didn't put the link in. I picked Grand Rapids because that's where your profile says you live. To schedule an appointment with a counselor, call (616) 771-4171 between 9 a.m. and 9 p.m., Monday through Thursday, and between 9 a.m. and 5 p.m. on Friday. Please allow at least an hour for an initial appointment. WMU - Grand Rapids Campus - GR Downtown - Center for Counseling and Psychological Services - Center for Counseling and Psychological Services Grand Rapids Graduate Center - Downtown 200 Ionia Ave SW Grand Rapids, MI 49503 Google Map Telephone: (616) 771-4171 Fax: (616) 742-5085

thanks gadget and thats right by the local community college that i go by. and i hear you in what you are saying..... i have to keep it professional with her and am going to do that. i keep debating and going back and fourth on what i s going to happen from there. i want to be friends but i get that what if she will change.... ive been throwing that what if out of my mind because i know it isnt the best for me but can be tough.... still lots to think about so i make sure that i make the correct decsion and thus why i want the counselor so i can spread out my options and get them laid out in front of me. thanks again for caring hun